When I squeeze the excess fat around my belly, it gives me comfort to know, I am prepared for a harsh winter.

If I blow air into a balloon I expect it to expand. Why is it I am surprised by my expanding belly?

I’m not sure if I like parades. I’m sure I like Oreos.

There’s something unnaturally, extraordinary about cream cheese and scrambled eggs.

Spur of the moment, Backyard cookouts, On a clear night. Will almost always be a great time.

Those that focus on the technique of the golf swing, Miss the pleasure of enjoying the swing. And fastidious eaters, Miss much of the same pleasures.

I like to having icing and my cake and my cookie ad eating too.

I would bet tension that causes arteries to constrict has caused more heart attacks than clogged arteries.

If I ate only when I was hungry what would I do when I was bored?

The only time I do not have an urge to snack, Is when I’m in the middle of a meal.

A lion makes a big kill, Then takes it easy for days or weeks. A hummingbird, Eats constantly to have the energy to keep eating. I think I am more of a flying lion.

If I were cream cheese. I would know my purpose, Was to be smeared on a bagel.

When an opportunity presents itself, Do not hesitate.  Especially if the opportunity is a bite of food, From your ravenous father’s dinner plate.

Someday man will be extinct on Earth. That is the reason I eat Swenson’s burgers whenever I get the chance!

Having only one favorite doughnut. Krispy Kreme chocolate covered glazed. Has simplified my life.

I’m pretty sure everything I eat, Turns to glucose. So why do I feel guilty eating a Snickers bar?

I know what to eat. I know how much to eat. But Ben and Jerry always win.

Find the food that nourishes your soul. And have a meal of it everyday. (hopefully, you know I’m not referring to actual food).